My problem.
Countdown to my liberation: TWO WEEKS & THREE DAYS
Brrrr. I have this urge to fast forward time again. Bleargh.
Its so cold in here.
What is it with old folks these days? First it was the ah peks, now the nyonyas are becoming just as annoying. I've already had a bad experience with the pak ciks, mak ciks, don't start plotting your act on me man. When my sister showed me a video of a Nyonya frantically digging her nose on the Mrt, I was like oh so bloody disgusted man. It brought out the hypochondriac in me. Later she managed to load up another video of this, other nyonya, peeling prawns on a bus. She actually just threw the shells all over the floor of the bus. No thanks to youtube, I can now justify my preconceived notions of the insanity that prevails amongst our older folks. I so do not hate old people alright, I'm just driving at the idea that perhaps, a more subtle form of 'madcow' disease is embedded in us and the older we get, the more ridiculously attention seeking we become probably a side effect of the inflammation in our head. I damn well hope i die before this innate infection manifests itself. The woman digging her nose had her quarter cordoned off. She carelessly took up both the seats of the twin sitter on the train and her bags of groceries(I presume) lay rather unwomanly, sprawled between her open legs. I can't use the plea of insanity to reason things out, coz one needs to have a decent level of sanity to wanna go shopping for stuff. That other woman, peeling prawns on a bus? I mean, seriously?! Why not cook them on the bus as well? It would be one hell of a delightful road trip. With the silliness from these coots, you can't blame me for not liking them.
My train ride this morning was marginally quite as annoying as the 'stars' on youtube. I couldn't make myself sit after witnessing that unhygienic display. So i stood on the steel plate that joins the carriages, usually its free from kids and oldies, coz they are afterall the ones with the weakest sense of balance. Tampines came, and peculiarly, more nyonyas came charging in. Maybe it was just that I actually took notice of them today. Whatever the case may be, they too wanna stand on the steel plates! Ha! I was almost rubbing shoulders with this guy next to me, when one pink-clad nyonya squeezed her way between us. I looked at her, raised my eyebrows in utter disbelief and inched my way away from her in the most subtle of ways. I'm not gonna blatantly relinquish my territory, uh uh, that would be enough signal for her to make a habit out of it. Sometimes, i wish i had body odour and a severe case of halitosis. Heh. All i would have to do is blow out some air when someone gets too close for comfort. And if they refuse, I will raise my arms and reach for the overhead bars. *lop-sided smile*
Anyways, i shan't digress any further. Simei came, and what do you know? ANother breed of nyonya walked in. The kind who thinks she is still an ah lian, living the much coveted Ah lian dream (whatever that means). Sashaying around with her pseudo-gothic-black spaghetti top, i could only identify her bottoms as a pair of black tights exposing the creases of her ass-crack, clip-on shades that disappeared mid-way through the ride and a pair of running shoes whose socks she gradually shed, one by one. Oh, don't forget the eyeliner, smudged as hell, but who cares, it is afterall the latest fad, so says herworld anyways. This one is really nyonya-youtube material. Whats the first thing a nyonya does when she boards the train? NO no, besides rushing for seats, lets assume there are no seats left for her. Aaaah, she cordons off her territory with whatever garbage she's carrying. Yup, and then she squats down. Yes SQUAT! For a moment there I saw Nelly and the gang with their shocked faces as they look upon the plot unfolding before my eyes, not sure if they were referring to this woman when they rapped, "...Get down and get your eagle on gerl..." I shudder at the prospect of seeing this woman on a rap video, shaking her tail feathers. Anyways, the whole time i was there, she was merely at that 'eagle' position rummaging through her neurotically aligned bags. She had about four bags, a red plastic bag, two white paper bags whose name i coudn't quite decipher and a black handbag, she seemed to be searching for something. Something, that perhaps even she wasn't sure of. She took her watch off her wrist, look at it, meddle with the knob, placed it back on, remove it again, placed it in her synthetic leather bag, removed it again...I lost her between those mundane repetitions. I started praying for god's protection, coz she hardly half a metre away from me. My mind conjures up the most revolting things when i'm in a state of disbelief. I had an image of her rummaging through my organs, like she was searching for something, "Where my hang-bag ah?"
When I got off, at Bedok, she was still excavating through her bags in that unsightly 'eagle' stand. Damn, i need therapy.
Brrrr. I have this urge to fast forward time again. Bleargh.
Its so cold in here.
What is it with old folks these days? First it was the ah peks, now the nyonyas are becoming just as annoying. I've already had a bad experience with the pak ciks, mak ciks, don't start plotting your act on me man. When my sister showed me a video of a Nyonya frantically digging her nose on the Mrt, I was like oh so bloody disgusted man. It brought out the hypochondriac in me. Later she managed to load up another video of this, other nyonya, peeling prawns on a bus. She actually just threw the shells all over the floor of the bus. No thanks to youtube, I can now justify my preconceived notions of the insanity that prevails amongst our older folks. I so do not hate old people alright, I'm just driving at the idea that perhaps, a more subtle form of 'madcow' disease is embedded in us and the older we get, the more ridiculously attention seeking we become probably a side effect of the inflammation in our head. I damn well hope i die before this innate infection manifests itself. The woman digging her nose had her quarter cordoned off. She carelessly took up both the seats of the twin sitter on the train and her bags of groceries(I presume) lay rather unwomanly, sprawled between her open legs. I can't use the plea of insanity to reason things out, coz one needs to have a decent level of sanity to wanna go shopping for stuff. That other woman, peeling prawns on a bus? I mean, seriously?! Why not cook them on the bus as well? It would be one hell of a delightful road trip. With the silliness from these coots, you can't blame me for not liking them.
My train ride this morning was marginally quite as annoying as the 'stars' on youtube. I couldn't make myself sit after witnessing that unhygienic display. So i stood on the steel plate that joins the carriages, usually its free from kids and oldies, coz they are afterall the ones with the weakest sense of balance. Tampines came, and peculiarly, more nyonyas came charging in. Maybe it was just that I actually took notice of them today. Whatever the case may be, they too wanna stand on the steel plates! Ha! I was almost rubbing shoulders with this guy next to me, when one pink-clad nyonya squeezed her way between us. I looked at her, raised my eyebrows in utter disbelief and inched my way away from her in the most subtle of ways. I'm not gonna blatantly relinquish my territory, uh uh, that would be enough signal for her to make a habit out of it. Sometimes, i wish i had body odour and a severe case of halitosis. Heh. All i would have to do is blow out some air when someone gets too close for comfort. And if they refuse, I will raise my arms and reach for the overhead bars. *lop-sided smile*
Anyways, i shan't digress any further. Simei came, and what do you know? ANother breed of nyonya walked in. The kind who thinks she is still an ah lian, living the much coveted Ah lian dream (whatever that means). Sashaying around with her pseudo-gothic-black spaghetti top, i could only identify her bottoms as a pair of black tights exposing the creases of her ass-crack, clip-on shades that disappeared mid-way through the ride and a pair of running shoes whose socks she gradually shed, one by one. Oh, don't forget the eyeliner, smudged as hell, but who cares, it is afterall the latest fad, so says herworld anyways. This one is really nyonya-youtube material. Whats the first thing a nyonya does when she boards the train? NO no, besides rushing for seats, lets assume there are no seats left for her. Aaaah, she cordons off her territory with whatever garbage she's carrying. Yup, and then she squats down. Yes SQUAT! For a moment there I saw Nelly and the gang with their shocked faces as they look upon the plot unfolding before my eyes, not sure if they were referring to this woman when they rapped, "...Get down and get your eagle on gerl..." I shudder at the prospect of seeing this woman on a rap video, shaking her tail feathers. Anyways, the whole time i was there, she was merely at that 'eagle' position rummaging through her neurotically aligned bags. She had about four bags, a red plastic bag, two white paper bags whose name i coudn't quite decipher and a black handbag, she seemed to be searching for something. Something, that perhaps even she wasn't sure of. She took her watch off her wrist, look at it, meddle with the knob, placed it back on, remove it again, placed it in her synthetic leather bag, removed it again...I lost her between those mundane repetitions. I started praying for god's protection, coz she hardly half a metre away from me. My mind conjures up the most revolting things when i'm in a state of disbelief. I had an image of her rummaging through my organs, like she was searching for something, "Where my hang-bag ah?"
When I got off, at Bedok, she was still excavating through her bags in that unsightly 'eagle' stand. Damn, i need therapy.
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